Me, Him, Us.

14.03.2010
Gosh of today, i feel myself going mad.
Is that he still important in my heart? or i just expectation to meet him?
i should know, we just a friend,normal and simple friend. right?
never mind.
i still remember , i can because of him to changed myself.
but, finally i didnt change at all. same as before. like to flirt.
i am single now, i feel single life for me is a best choice.
what is Love? sorry , i still dont understand that meaning.
i have no right to love a person. i dont know how to treasure everyone.
single life , have many benefits. if i can choose, i choose single.
i blame myself, why i dont treasure myself, always get hurt by boys.
no more revenge, just let myself know more about this society and world.
Love just a weapons to kill people. how cruel that is?
learn to protect myself. learn to recognize who is good for us.
i wont be stupid and silly again. bla bla bla.
single life, i can enjoyment it.

17.03.2010
Now i sitting in front the Pc, hmm..anything i want write down here?
erm.. about last night, memories is about me and him.
if this world have ''time machine'', i pray i can stop time passed.
Last night, the feeling is come back. gosh , is a big trouble.
He make me blush,abnormal ,heartbeat.
OMG,i falling in love to him again. who else can stop me now?
But, i dont understand myself why super nervous this time?
Am i mad? i reject all the meeting and dating and just wanna meet him.
just awhile also satisfied. i really feel myself is crazy.
We ate at De Garden. chitchat, when he eating, i keep pinch his face.
my face more chubby than his face. LOL.
erm.. he changed. changed to handsome ,humorous, and mature.
dont know how to describe, i just felt.
finally, i own dont like he smoke ,in front me. i snatch his cigarette。
thought wanna throw in to the trash. but his face look like not willing .
sigh, why he changed like that. quit smoking can?
i am not often to smoke. except club.
Jom, Club 9 .just we both.
when he hold my hand. i look at him,he had no expression. LOL
i think wednesday was less people. unbelievable.
not that less, had fun too.
one glass by one glass. i am easily drunk.
plus, i dinner just eat a little bit. the stomach is empty.
could i walk like a straight line? nope,not steady.
actually, drunk add cigarette is enjoyment. i like it. delicious cigarette.
Club with him not that boring,even though just we both.
sorry , that i drunk. take care of me is that very troublesome?
I talk to oneself and alot nonsense in the car . break my image in front him!arghh.
arrived my sweet home.
open the door is a hard thing for me at that moment.
Lying on the sofa. many thing appear turn round and round in my mind. faint.
i vomited at last, alcohol make me suffer. yuckk.
i need to bed.
waked at 7something,i need feed my stomach. it is calling me.
drink a glass of warm honey .make me well.
well, last night had a sweet memories about us.
Keep The Top Secret.